Rocket Man

Google images: Kim Jong Un

We held our breath (those of us who cared)

The world’s press were invited to watch (despite global condemnation)

The rocket would launch a satellite for weather research. (really, a ballistic missile test)

We waited, breathe batied, would they launch despite everything? (yes they did)

But in the end thankfully, it was a damp squid.

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I expect heads will roll for this spectacular public belly flop. I (for one) am so pleased it failed. Imagine the danger to the rest of the world if this country goes nuclear along with Iran too….shudders.

Shared with G-Man’s Friday Flash 55

To Kill a Mocking Bird

Helping the teen with an essay on her thoughts of the novel To Kill a Mocking Bird.

She quotes someone’s speech and, I asked who this person was.

“She’s not important!”

“Why’s she even mentioned then. Why did the boy have to read for her?”

“It was punishment”

“For what?”

“Because he cut her bush.”

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Nearly fell off my chair and honestly couldn’t speak for laughing, and then….. she realised why.

I told her no way on this God’s earth was I letting her leave that sentence in it like that and made her find what type of bush it was she was speaking about. It was a Camellia bush …pheeeeew. Gonna have a heart attack from laughing so much one of these days 🙂

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Jaguar Cars

An ad on TV showed the newest car.

“You know who makes them do you?”

“No, who?”

“Jaguar is originally a posh car made in the UK.”

“It’s not JagUar, it’s JagWar.”

“No, it’s pronounced JagUar, not JagWar. Jagwar is the American way of pronouncing it.”

“No, no, no, it’s JagWar.”

So, we  Googled it.

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Jaguar Cars  It states  Jag-ew-ar EW together makes U  known simply as Jaguar (play /ˈæɡjuː.ər/ jag-ew-ər),   Da daaaaa

My-soon-to-be-16 teen once asked me what a Bar rock was… I had to ask a few times what she was saying so that it was clear. Yep it was a Bar rock. I had no idea what she was asking me. It was a word I’d never heard before. So, I asked her to tell me what context it was used in.

“It’s was what soldiers live in”

“Ohhhhh.. you mean a Barrack!”…

We do have some giggles over our different accents and what are ‘new’ words to her.

Shared with G=Man’s Friday Flash 55

Postcards

A postcard arrived addressed to my dog.
Yes, to my dog!
It had a nice picture and little dog paw print on one side. On the other side of it was:
“Dear Timmy, please remind Brenda that it is soon time for your booster shot. Ask her to call us when it is convenient. Woof!

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I thought it was pretty cute and novel way of reminding me that Timmy needs to take me to the vet 🙂

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Sloppy Joes

“So, can we have that for supper?”

“I don’t know how to make it.”

“My dad told me. It’s really easy. He said all you need is a couple of things.”

“I don’t know how to make Floppy Joes.”

“Oh, that’s a great name for it! Must remember to tell the guys that at school.”

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Of course, mention anything ‘floppy’ and a mans name now to a soon-to-be 16 year old girl is dynamite.
She cracked up when I got the name wrong. I’ve never made Sloppy Joes before and she asked her dad how to and wants me to make them.
Well, I got the name mixed up….. hahaha we did have a giggle for a few minutes, especially when she said she was going to tell her her school pals the new name for them….LOL

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Sirens

Driving highways here, three cars is heavy traffic.
Radio blaring.
Suddenly hear a siren in the distance.
Gulps.
Instant foot off the gas.
Check all mirrors. Can’t see them anywhere.
Heart slows down but, siren goes off again.
Foot on brake. Speed dead on.
Turn radio off. Siren stops!

Was a SONG on the radio!

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On the country roads here there is very little traffic and I am guilty of enjoying speed.
That made me feel so bad though, taught me a lesson, for sure .. for a while.
I didn’t realise it was song I hadn’t heard before which had a police siren at various parts through it.
It did give me a fright though, thought: ‘Okay, it’s a fair cop. I’m gonna get a ticket for speeding and, boy was I!’

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Snakes

So sick of Subway’s ‘Foot long, foot long’ ads I muted the TV and was
on Stumbleupon, stumbling along my interests and happened across a story that seemed to scream out: G-Man’s friday Flash 55
Read the Headline and couldn’t believe my eyes, but seeing is believing.
I went to the story and found this:

The website says it was found China the digger had accidentally killed it. It was 55 feet!

Shivers…..ewwww

Shared with G-Man’s friday Flash 55

Somebody’s Father


Chat, chat chatting to one of her BFF’s on the phone.  I hear: “Oh do you remember so and so? We used to say she was in the Mafia.

Silence

You know who I mean?   Sure you know… the Mafia, from that movie.”

Longer silence.

There was an old movie about it called: “The Step-Father”

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At which point I burst out laughing and told her the movie was a very famous one and called ‘The Godfather’

“Oh”…she said and giggled.  “Oh well I knew it was somebody’s father”…haha

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Just Deserts

 

This is Chloe’s umpteenth time reading the Harry Potter book series. I swear she skims pages because she reads whole books in a day.
The other night she had been reading one again for a while. I was watching TV and she suddenly asks:“What’s treacle tart Bren?”
I explain.
“Okay so, what’s a spotted dick?
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We both know that she knows a lot about a lot of things now and.. she just burst out laughing.
I explained it was another very English desert that was a steamed pudding mixed with currants, hence the name spotted… but, then of course she asks me: “Yeah, but who in their right mind would’ve called it dick….Spotted dick… huh, huh, huh’…and cracked up some more!

Hahaha.. .. we both just started laughing and then, I was crying from laughing so much (between telling her not to be crude)
She didn’t believe that they were for real so, I had to find pictures of both a Treacle tart and a Spotted dick to show her they weren’t just imaginary deserts for the Harry Potter book. Treacle is English for Golden Syrup (all sugar) It is golden in colour and they make a lot of sweet cakes and tart dishes from it. Both very yummy. My mum used to make all of these things and I remember she would steam the puddings in pieces of old white rags.  There was none of that fancy cooking tools back then. We never once had food poisoning then either.  We’ve yet to cover ‘Rolly Polly pudding, and bacon pudding’…haha

 

Sometimes it’s a laugh a minute in our house.

Shared with G-Man’s #Friday Flash 55

Mars

On bended elbow it crawled toward me as
I beseeched for mercy. Cowered behind the towering shallows
lest it could read my mind.
Testing willpower to its limits, it played games… The dirty kind.

‘Resistance is futile.’ Its voice did say.

‘Why?’ asked I.

“Because… a Mars a day helps you work, rest and play.’

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A bit tongue in cheek, but a fun one for:

dVerse #Meeting the Bar
G-Man’s Friday Flash 55

Skateboarding

“It’s so easy Bren, you just get on and you go.” They all shouted at once.
“I’m not so sure I know what to do.” I replied, a little nervous.
“Just do it Bren. Go on!”
So, on it I jumped and as the wheels spun, I wobbled and soon ended up on my bum.

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My nephews all nagged me to try skateboarding when it first came to the UK. I was in my late 30’s then, still young enough to feel pretty invincible and not worry too much about broken bones (back then.) They had their skateboards outside and we had a long path at the side of the house, they were all nagging on at me to have a go.
Having been a decent roller skater I thought a skateboard was the same, so easy. I didn’t realise the wheels were on a balance thingie and the board itself rolled from side to side so, you went sideways as well as forwards. As soon as I stepped onto it…it started moving and I came right off onto my butt. That was my first and last ever try on a skateboard.
They are strictly for the young or foolish. LOL

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Timmy Two Balls

The little dog is not complete without his balls.
For he always plays with not one ball, but two.
Bright yellow, practice golf balls but, he doesn’t care
what their colour is or what their real use is. All he cares
is that they are his to pick up, chase, chomp, chew on, and play.

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Ever since he was a young puppy Timmy has never played with just one ball. He won’t chase just one, it has to be thrown and, he’ll wait with his eyes on the other one until it’s thrown before, he’ll go for them. These are like a sponge but not soft at all so that bits come off or I wouldn’t let him play with them. It’s very comical to see him run with two in his mouth and even more so if he tries to pick up and carry three, or, one large and one small one… LOL

As the dVerse prompt was ‘Imagism’ I was looking through all my pics, for objects to focus thought on for the prompt and saw several pics of Tim with his two balls and thought, ‘ah ha…hope his spherical objects fit in with Imagism.’ It also is for G-Man’s Friday Flash 55 prompt too. Just a bit of fun.

Shared with  dVersePoets Prompt #Imagism
G-Man’s Friday Flash 55

Verbatim

An old song came on the TV while we were eating supper. She starts singing along to the words: “Grab your coat and get your hat leave your worries on the…” I asked what she sang, so that I was clear about what I’d heard. Her reply left me giggling so much, I nearly choked.
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Chloe left the TV on in the living room as we were sitting at the kitchen table eating supper. An ad came on and she’d gotten very good at copying singers, mimicking word for word. Tony Bennet is doing a voice over song and she’s heard it a couple of times. It’s the old song…”Grab your coat and get your hat, leave your worries”….
I don’t know how but…..She always manages to give me the giggles when I have a mouthful of food or drink so I nearly choke through laughing so much because…from nowhere she burst out singing:

“Grab your coat and get your hat… leave your worries on the ‘toaster’

OMGoodnessss…….. I nearly choked from laughing so much.

She asked. “What’s so funny???”

I was bright red in the face trying to chew my food enough so I could tell her, but couldn’t stop laughing.
Once I’d stopped enough to tell her that the real words are “Leave your worries on the doorstep, life can be so sweet on the sunny side of the street.”…. she came back as quick as a flash:

” Ohhhhhhh….I thought he was singing leave your worries on the toaster.  Oh well, I like my version better ….and carried on leaving her worries on the toaster again….” LOL  That meal was hysterical.

I’ve always called these: ‘Chloe gems’

Shared with G-Man’s Friday Flash 55

Cinderella

Fifteen and a half, growing up so fast, Cinderella went to the end of year dance. All dressed up with silver high heels. She danced and she danced, had a ball at the ball. I picked her up at ten and she said: “Had such a great time, but boy my feet are killing me.”

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I asked: “Why are your feet hurting, you do know none of the women dance in high heels at dances, don’t you?”

“Oh… I saw them all dancing without shoes and thought… I’m the only one still wearing mine.” (Rolls eyes)

Still, feet killing her aside…she had a fabulous time!

Our little Yorkie Timmy was wondering what she was up to, as I was taking some pics of her to send to family … LOL

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