Against all Odds


As a child all that was known
was hurt and betrayal
So many strangers, absolute fear
till fear itself was champion.

A mind full of doubt, mistrust
utter chaos of dark paths
and night terrors
with only one clear goal
…to escape.

I hated the world
my life
and most of the people in it
who took away my childhood
my innocence and trust
then,
met other haters and didn’t
like what I saw
so,
determined not to fall into
the repeating cycle and become
filled with only bitterness
set out to fill my mind with
knowledge because, knowledge
is power.

To learn as much as I could
from books, from people
from anyone and anything who
knew so much more than I
about what life is really
supposed to be.

Like a sponge that could never
have its fill
I learn something new
every day…still.

There’s no comfort in hate
no satisfaction in holding onto
anger which simply destroys the
heart which feeds it
instead I chose the way of love
To fill my mind with only that
and nestle into the soft compassion of
its pure white light and energy.

We are all sinners
each and everyone of us
but
‘What we think is what
we become.’

Instead of being a victim
I chose instead, to become…. me.

You get back what you give out

this is our Karma.

~*~

© Daydreamertoo     *All rights reserved

As a young teen I was so angry at the world, even angry with my mother for the dreadful childhoods we had. Til I met a whole load more angry young people just like me in the army and realised, I wasn’t the only one who ever suffered and, didn’t want to hate the world, I just needed to discover what life had made of me thus far and to learn that because ‘this’ has happened it did not mean ‘that’ (hate)  had to happen as a consequence.
All of our lives we are growing, learning, teaching, and we never stop day by day. We shape our lives by the choices we make good or, bad.

Shared with Three Word Wednesday CCXC Absolute, Fall, Nestle
Poetry Jam Take a much closer look (at something) I took a look at myself…haha

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Author: Daydreamer

I live on a beautiful island in Atlantic Canada and design custom made candles

20 thoughts on “Against all Odds”

  1. Wow, this one moved me to tears, strikes very close to home for me. Making that choice to move beyond being a victim into something more is a huge step in healing. Takes a whole lot of guts too. A beautifully written poem.

  2. Wow, Bren, such a journey you have made – the very best kind, from pain to compassion. Way to be! And Chloe has reaped the benefits, since you broke the cycle.

  3. “Anger . . . destroys the heart that feeds it” So true. Your poem works out a very healthy way to live, and does it beautifully.

  4. i SOOO agree with you! and i feel that if we stay in negative thoughts, we draw negative things into our life. there are enough negative things in life without adding more to it.

    as you say, hate destroys the heart that feeds it. i love the poem and your attitude, Bren!

  5. Taking a close look at yourself–an excellent thing in life and in poetry here! Thanks for sharing this and congrats on moving away from hate.

  6. Brenda, you are so wise. That is the solution, forgive and ditch the anger. It kinda lies there waiting for opportunity, sometimes–however, I’m so glad you realized that your thoughts, that what we think we become–you are an inspiration. So happy to have met you in this poetic journey.

  7. I have come to believe that everything we go thru and experience makes us who and what we are today….It’s a relatively new way of thinking for me, but I am so happy I got to this place.

  8. smiles…i like that you chose yourself….self inspection is def important and we should measure our beliefs and attitudes and what goes into their creation…there was a point i def hated life and tried to kill myself…not specifically but in the lifestyle i lived and sought….it was brutal….glad you survived it bren…

  9. I was quietly cheering yes and admiring how you saw your future through..knowledge is power..but perhaps it is only powerful when we use it to fill ourselves..Jae

  10. What an inspiration you are. So many don’t have the awareness to make that choice to not wallow in their negative emotions and have them color their world for the rest of their lives. It’s so very true…we are what we think. But still I struggle with my feelings about my childhood and my parents…it seems to be an ongoing process of learning to accept. I’m happy for you.

  11. Yes, you DID take a closer look at yourself. Good that you did not follow the path of ‘hatred’ that you could have followed but found your own better path. Hatred doesn’t serve anyone. There is a quote that always stuck with me from a college psych course.. (Wish I could remember who said it now.) “It may be your parents’ fault that you are the way you are, but it is your fault if you stay that way.” So true, I think.

  12. Yeah the crap is going to come, childhood it is in a way easier to deal with and worse at the same time I suppose. Sucks all the same though, but it’s always there.

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