Mothers Pride

Through the lean years
only scraps on the table
hunger ate straight from the sugar bowl
Bread and gravy, a feast to fill
and chicken, pure Christmas delight.

A gentle spirit shone its
brightest light for the
meek and mild child to follow
where it lead

and,

shown there was more to life
to admire, to aspire
She picked up each broken
piece of trust, each wound and
each betrayal
Each broken piece of love
and held onto it tight
(sometimes too tight for love to breathe)
there was so much she had to learn.

She grew and knew
we can remain ‘neath the shroud
of those hunger years
or,
despite them

Make a wanting mother
proud.

~*~

© Daydreamertoo    *All rights reserved

My childhood was not easy.  My birth father died when I was 2 and 1/2 years old and from 3 years old my (closest in age) sister and I were placed in many, many, foster homes both state run and, private. I have mostly dreadful memories, the first being, having my leg broken by an impatient woman at 3 years old. Until we finally all went to live with our mother & stepfather when I was around 9.

My mother became pregnant at 16, married and by the time she was 21 she’d had 5 children. By the time she was 36 she was a grandmother. She was so ignorant in so many ways. Completely unable to cope with housekeeping and money and yet, she kept on having babies. In the end she had 10 children, 5 to my father and 5 to my step-father (who was my own father’s brother) yes, it is legal for a widow to marry her deceased husband’s brother.

My point is, we get to where we are because of where we’ve been but, because we are poor, malnourished, etc, we don’t have to remain there. At 17 I was very angry with everyone.  Angry at the world for all its many wrongs but, we have a choice to make. We can either stay in that cycle or, we can break it. I knew if I continued to feel hatred and anger it would eventually be my downfall. So, I made a conscious choice to walk the path of love… to never hurt anyone throughout my life in the many ways in which I’d been hurt as a child who trusted those adults who came into my life.

For all her faults, I loved my mother. She was the best mother that she knew how to be and, she loved us all.
Never once did she judge me, never once did she fail to tell me how proud she was of all of the things I had set out to do and have achieved over the course of my life and, that unconditional love and complete acceptance of me for who and what I am helped immensely to make me the person that I am today.

I believe every child has a right to their childhood. To not have their innocence stolen. To not have their trust broken. I believe they should believe in ‘the good fairy’ in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny and keep those beliefs for as long as possible. No child asks to be born and, it is the parents responsibility to raise them in a safe and loving environment as they can.

Our past shapes us but…. it doesn’t have to break us. Through a good education we are given choices to each become more than those hardships we have known and, to be a better person for them.

Shared a small piece of my heart here with you all in the hope that it might help someone, somewhere.

Shared with Thursday Think Tank #70 Hunger
Three Word wednesday #CCLX11 

ABC Wednesday #Prompt letter ‘M’

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Author: Daydreamer

I live on a beautiful island in Atlantic Canada and design custom made candles

24 thoughts on “Mothers Pride”

  1. Thanks for sharing this…my childhood was also tough…my father died this year, my mother in 2007..recently I learned a tragic secret in their lives that now explains so much..your words have struck a chord in my heart with pieces of familiarity…great work

  2. thanks for sharing from the heart… hunger has many faces… sorry for your pain… perhaps you are a stronger person for it and are able to relate to situations many others can not… I light in the darkness

  3. You are a very good daughter…
    I really like your wisdom..sure..it is a real lesson..

    “Our past shapes us but…. it doesn’t have to break us. Through a good education we are given choices to each become more than those hardships we have known and, to be a better person for them.”

    Great…

  4. Oh, I wish I could give you a hug! My Mother’s life was similar. Her Mother pregnant at 15 and a grandmother at 32. There weren’t as many mouths to feed, but my Mom’s Dad died at age 4 and her mother didn’t remarry. It was a hard life, lots of lack of. I admire your view and how you have seen the best! This is how we all should see the world! I am sorry for your struggles; so glad you shared a piece of your soul~xo

  5. Wow, Bren, thanks for sharing a piece of your heart. A very tough childhood, for sure, and I so admire that you not only survived but transcended and created a wonderful life for yourself, but also have such compassion for your mom. The poem is superb. “Hunger ate straight from the sugar bowl”.

  6. Yours is the story of a survivor vs. a perennial victim. I know folks in their 60s who stil play the “poor me” card; it’s not their fault, they simply didn’t get given the same raw materials and choices other folks got. I applaud the openness of your poem, of your story. God bless your mom and I’m thankful you can love her “in spite of.” That’s how I came to love my dad who molested me… it takes time and lots of work, but you CAN make it through hell. You are a survivor! Love, Amy

  7. An awesome tribute to your mother.

    It’s easy to become bitter at the world when one is born into one of hardship and abuse. You are right in that there is a choice in the attitude and having that determination to live. Much respect to your mother — for I know of some who pass their bitterness at life on to their kids.

    Thanks for sharing your poem and experience.

  8. O my! This is heartbreaking! 😦 Thanks for sharing with us! 10 children? Bless her soul!!!! Are you jewish? Biblical laws state it is okay to carry on the family name, to protect the widow and her reputation brothers can marry brother’s widows. Apart from that I have not heard much else in the world where that is done. It is shocking to some but quite known where I grew up. What a nice poem for an innocent, your mom, a child herself when she had to grow so fast to raise her babies 😦
    hugsss!

  9. Thank you very much Bren for opening your heart…
    What you write is a real lesson for everyone and can see what’s important in life … love ….. unconditional….
    I was very fortunate to have a childhood sweet and happy and your words moved me so much …
    Thank you …

  10. I enjoyed this poem about your mother. I do think that most mothers strive to do the very best they can for their children. And it is nice to hear that though your mother had her flaws you grew to love her. I don’t think it is unusual for girls in late teen years to be angry with their mothers. In a few years, amazingly, they look at their mothers (and the world)with different eyes.

  11. it sounds like you had a hard childhood but despite it all you survived and became the great person you are. Thank you for sharing with us I know how hard it can be to share those bad times.

  12. Yes indeed..nobody need be poor of mind..although it sometimes takes much courage..much scrabbling around in the ruins..your mum is beautiful..as is your writing..Jae

  13. These are a few important lessons life teaches us and all, how to make ourselves a better person!! You have done well through the learning process!! .. and glad of being squeezed through the grind aren’t you?? Thank you for the share Daydreamertoo!! It was so heartfelt!!
    With best wishes and hugs
    xoxoxo
    Cheers!!

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